One day at a time

It is often said that the arrival of a newborn changes families completely and forever - for better or for worse. I never really understood the significance of this thought, till now.

Everything and everyone has changed. Husband, parents, brother and friends,`preoccupations, joys and fears - everything about life is now different. Most of the changes are positive, not being able to browse through bookshelves because baby is screaming his lungs out in the buggy is one of the few negatives, easily overlooked.

Another bit of advice that everyone from the ante-natal class organisers to parents to well-wishing friends and acquaintances gave was to take one day at a time. I never quite understood this one. I never really got why one would need or want to do that. Now everyday that is successfully managed without accident or incident is celebrated - with broken sleep, but sleep all the same. It is more precious than gold these days.

So taking one day at a time, I am embarking upon the pursuit of normalcy. The definition of normalcy also has had to be altered. Normal is not how it used to be, normal will now be the best, or even half decent, that it can be now. An afternoon walk by the river, accomplished with little to no crying, is a noteworthy achievement - the day can be labelled a huge success.

To more such days, of sunshine, warmth, cheerful companions, happy babies and pure contentment.

Sleep

I love sleeping. Have always loved it. Have always needed a little more of it than my family and friends around. Have always felt incapable of functioning normally without adequate amounts of it. Have no idea how people survive with little or none of it.

I miss my sleep sorely.

Despite great help from A in managing night feeds for N, I crave for the time when sleep was undisturbed and not such a rarity, a luxury that must now be stolen or snatched in tiny bits here and there. What would I now give for those lazy Sunday mornings, drenched in sleepy semi-thoughts, warmed by the gentle sun streaming in through the blinds!

And yet, somehow, it all seems alright. One person in the house is sleeping well and just looking at his contented, peaceful sleep is a surprising reward. Sometimes, exhausted at the end of the day, A and I just sit and look at him sleeping. It is an amazing, humbling feeling. And when he smiles in his sleep, all grudges are forgiven!

Life part 2 - parenthood

He is finally here - and our lives have changed forever. Just before midnight on the 23rd of February, A and I left the hospital with the precious cargo - our little one then just over 24 hours old. We were very silent as we walked to the car park - this couldn't possibly be happening to us - it was the lull before the storm that a newborn brings into one's life. And no books or parenting classes on earth can prepare you for what comes next.

I don't have the benefit of hindsight at the moment. Being very much in the thick of things still, I am continuously battling the mischivious hormones, laughing and crying without warning. I am still too close to the events to think straight about labour, breastfeeding, nappy changes and sleepless nights. For the moment, life is an unending saga of the feeding-burping-nappy changing-feeding circle. I am told it gets better and I am patiently waiting.
To be honest, this wait isn't bad at all. I have a little companion, a son, to make some sweet and sour memories with. If the last three weeks are anything to go by, we're not going to have a dull moment! Little N and I are in the process of learning to understand each other - and while we don't always get it right, we still love the journey!